I usually think experiences in my personal life help me manage the ones in my professional life.But a recent thought led me to apply a journalism tenet to the former: there’s more than one side to every story.
I wondered a few weeks ago what version of our “break-up” my most recent ex-“bf” was telling his friends, family, acquaintances -- if he did at all. I certainly know what my version of the whole thing was.
But the thought led me to re-examine myself. What had I done wrong? Maybe I was too busy, ambitious, controlling, intimidating, Trinidadian?
I’ll never know because I’ll never ask because I’m not interested in asking about a past I left behind too easily.
They teach us to have at least three sources in a story, to get the good and bad, the complainers and the defenders; yet here I was thinking only about my side of things.
It’s funny how this job nudges you to remember and acknowledge when you forget, like personal mistakes versus having to run a correction.
Does his story matter? To him, yes. But my accepting personal responsibility helps me grow. I can never fault that.
Photo courtesy procorbis.com
2 comments:
A journalist is ethic-bound to discount the bias of his/her sources and render all sides of the story to the reader so that they may decide the truth for themselves. A human being on the other hand has the luxury of 'censoring' his/her sources as they see fit.
For some this censorship makes life simpler because they can convince themselves that everyone views them the same way that they view themselves. For others it's a defense mechanism to shield their psyche from the ravages of a hostile world.
Many of us only let those very close to us (who we can trust) or strangers (who have no vested interest) be our sources for our personal story. This is probably better for personal growth than relying only on ourselves. After all, the eye sees not itself but by reflection…
Whatever the reason and whatever the method, self-reflection is essential. I consider it a process rather than action. It grows and evolves as we do. So let’s keep seeking the true story within but expect to issue a ‘retraction’ every now and then when we slip up and are simply being human.
~T
"The art of reflection is the way of a mature adult."
- Alvin Cobham, my father, mentor and biggest champion
Thanks for your comment, tisziq.
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