The past several days have been absolute chaos in my world. It's why I haven't had time to breathe, far less cry. As I write this, press releases are popping up in my inbox with a regularity that's disturbing when I'm stressed.
I've had Thanksgiving with the family in Kissimmee, moved apartments, done breathing exercises over poorly-painted accent walls and a ripped sectional couch, christened my goddaughter, completed and procrastinated on end-of-semester graduate research papers, produced my usual quota of stories at the newspaper, spent more than 24 hours on the road, been trying to sell my old car, pulled on galoshes and picked up a sword to wade through and fight daily minutia.
I've felt, at least 10 times a day, that I've been losing my mind--and gumming the cracks with Krazy Glue.
But in between the moments I've had to talk myself through, I've had moments of such startling clarity that the world is beautiful, that my world is beautiful: Holding hands over the Thanksgiving meal with my family and watching my cousin's pregnant girlfriend glow as she gets ready to bring new life into the world; seeing the stars aligned; getting an extension on a paper that removed a heavy burden from my shoulders; playing with my goddaughter; driving on a clear day.
It's harder to do some days than others, but it's so important to remind yourself that even though life can be a series of difficult choices and stresses, it also holds so many positive moments and blessings that are ignored during crises.
I know I don't do it as often as I should, but when I do have those moments of clarity, I inhale, I hold onto them for dear life. Deadlines and finances and time become irrelevant and for that one moment, before everything comes crashing down again, I know everything with be alright.
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